What is a monkeybox?

When I was a little girl, we had a pet monkey named Amanda. My Dad worked in the produce business, so each night he brought home that days culls in a big box - spotty cucumbers, pithy apples, limp celery, moldy oranges and the like. We called it a monkeybox. It was really just trash, but my Mom would take each piece of fruit and trim it, pare it and cut it up to make a beautiful fruit platter for Amanda. Even though it was deemed trash by one, it still had life left in it and was good for the purpose we needed it. That's how I live my life - thrifting, yard saling, looking for another's trash to be my treasure.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

Dear Mr. Novelli

Dear Mr. Novelli,

I received the Membership packet to day to join AARP. I believe it was nearly a year ago that I discussed this very same issue here.

I must tell you that seeing the envelope in my mailbox reading: "AARP - The Best Resource for People over 50, like Yourself", was a hard pill to swallow.
You see lately, I have been noticing a few more stray gray hairs at the temple which I promptly doused with Clairol Loving Color #44B and a line or two around my eyes. Also, my 18th Wedding Anniversary is this month, followed by upcoming 25th High School Reunion. So, I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed and a bit older as of late.
However, Mr. Novelli, I am NOT FIFTY YEARS OLD. I am 42 years old. Somedays I wish I wasn't 42 and I cringe at the thought of it. But, announcing I am 42 beatr the hell out of YOU saying I am 50! Over 50, in fact! Ack! I will not be 50 for eight more years. My son will be a 21 year old beer drinking, draft eligible, registered voting college student when I am 5o. We are talking an eternity until that time! I will be celebrating my 26th Wedding Anniversary by then. I will have been out of high school for 33 years. But, none of those things, I REPEAT, NONE of those things will happen until I am FIFTY YEARS OLD, so kindly keep your yearly invitations to YOURSELF and stop inflicting more downer into my day. Shame on you Mr. Novelli!
A Spring Chicken
42 year old - Shara
PS to my readers: I know being 50 years old isn't a bad thing. It's just that I AM NOT FIFTY YEARS OLD!


  1. Anonymous5:26 PM

    shara, I know what you mean. I am
    48 and get those "invitations" also. The only thing I like about
    this is the "senior discount". Sometimes at our local thrift stores they ask if I am 55 and sometimes when I am feeling old, I
    say yes and I get an additional 30%
    off! ha! S. (By the way, I have a
    12 year old son, too).

  2. Oh, those "invitations" make me so mad I stomp all the way back to the house (we have a very long driveway) and run them right through the shredder! Nobody under 70 joins AARP. I don't know why they bother. I am feeling your outrage. Even if you are, you know, a little younger.

  3. They do that to everybody, I remember getting them when I was 40 too. You'd think they'd learn! But I gotta tell you, AARP aside...being 50 absolutely rocks, it is the best! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

    Trust me!

  4. Shara, I just want to tell you that you have an awesome blog and I just love reading it. I too get AARP invites - however, I am 56 so it's justified. But, I throw them away. I would rather pay full price than admit to being over 50, hah! Also, I don't think you are a "snoop." I like to watch the neighbors too!!!


  5. LOL...

    One of the times I got one of those I returned it with a nasty "I AM NOT GOING TO be 50 FOR *** YEARS! HOW DARE YOU SEND ME THIS!!"

  6. I am 45 now, but just after I turned 40 the woman at the grocery store asked me if I wanted the senior discount. I was flabbergasted and couldn't even reply! If I see her as a checker I NEVER go thru her lane. Totally put me in a bad funk about turning 40 (but I am wayyyy over it now...I like the 40s)

  7. Well, lucky me, I got to become a member of AARP in my 30s thanks to my much older husband who qualified. :[ But, they won't give me health insurance and the discount at hotels is usually the same as AAA so what good is it doing me?


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