A Fowl Post

First Matter of Business:

Who does the chicken breast look like?

*Answer below.

**Yes, I know. I need a life.*

I went to three two yard sales and four thrift stores today and I spent a grand total of $3.00. I mean, the money part is good, but there was nothing anywhere. Half empty stores with junk, junk, junk. Not the good junk. The vinyl tablecloth, fruitcake tin, carnival stuffed animal, Microwave Cookbook, "What to Expect When You're Expecting", golf club, same old same old thrift store junk. No treasures. The Bean, on the other hand, had a stellar day, featuring a Remote Control Tarantula, Robotic arm and a Giant 15" tall Pex dispenser for a grand total of $3.50.

Empty Hand Syndrome (EHS) forced me to buy two packs of vintage black rick rack for 25¢ each at one thrift store. At another thrift I bought a 1947 Heinz Salad Cookbook with such delightful recipes as shredded carrots and peas in a mayonaisse lace gelatin mold (gag) for 25¢. The only buy at the Salvation Army was a book about "Displaying With Style" - How to display your collections for $1.00. I thought you were just supposed to pile your crap on the table, but apparently not! The fourth thrift store was so pathetic and overpriced, that I actually did leave empty handed.

The first yard sale proved to be BABY ONLY. Plastic baby apparatices, plasticky toys and baby clothes galore. Great sale if I had a baby. But, I do not. Adios Amigos.

The second sale had a big green sign on the corner. "SALE" it exclaimed! I turned the corner, rounded a curve, crested over a hill and saw the Mother Of All Yard Sales. Tons of things. Boxes piles here and there. Interesting items lining the driveway. Stuff, junk, crap, treasures. My kind of sale! I bounded out of the car money in hand and the lady having the sale standing there said, "I am just trying to clean out my garage!" The sale was on the next block, she added. Boy, was I humiliated. Once I left (hurriedly!) I found the other sale. I told the story of the garage cleaning lady and she told me everyone had told her that same story all day. So, ha ha lady. You are the doof, not me.

***I once knew were there was a house with so much stuff and junk piled in their yard that they had a permanent plywood sign staked in the yard that said "NOT A YARD SALE". Of course, everyone still stopped because all they really read was "YARD SALE". And, since I am telling this story, I would be remiss not to mention that a few years later the police found a dead body rolled up in a rug in that very same house. Stories like that just stay in my head and have to come out at some point. Thank you for listening.

The real actual yard sale looked like a flop from the road - only a few kid items. But, the garage had more things inside. I still only spent $1.25, but am thrilled with what I did buy. I found four packages of Dennison crepe paper in a lovely shade of pink. It's not old, but at 25¢ a package, I know I can play around with it and add it to my craftinesswithout worrying about ruining the good stuff.

And, my payback for looking and searching for a treasure all day:

*Swoon*

Freaking adorable, no? I'm not sure if she's new or vintage or vintage inspired. The latter most likely. She is comprised of a chalk egg that actually opens up. The egg is covered in pink metallic foil. She has millenary flowers at her feet, a tulle and crepe collar and is just so damn cute. I know Easter is over. But, to me, this is not an Easter only item. This is a "put it out so I can see it and swoon over it everyday" item. Did I mention she was A QUARTER? *Swoon* Lucky for me she was broken (only I would say that!), but the part was there, so I fixed her and I would defy anyone to guess what was ever wrong with her.... It was minor, but her "defect" made her only cost 25¢.

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Earlier this week I bought these vintage rooster items at a thrift. I spent more for them than I normally do ($9.00 total), but they had the Salt Shaker priced $2.00, the Pepper Shaker priced $2.00, the tea pot was $3.00 and the cups were $1.00 each and I hated to see them go separate ways when they were obviously a set and have been a set for at least 50 years. Plus, they are pristine, the cold paint is in perfect shape and there isn't a nick on them. When I got home, I was sort of sad because I thought there was a lid missing from the "cup" which I assumed was a sugar and a creamer. I didn't talk about them on here because I felt that I didn't get that great of a deal for $9.00 since a piece was missing.

But, then, the very next day I ws playing around with them and discoverd this:

They stack! Mama and her babies - complete! Yea, for me.

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Back to the chicken breast at the top:

*It's Bill Clinton. A spitting image. Right?

**Am I right?????

***Or is it just me?

***Don't answer that.